A year to black belt

Again it has been forever since I have written anything here. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new week, and also 9-10 weeks until what will be my first Ban Bu belt camp with the physical testing. So this week I resolve on Monday to begin and complete the 9 week couch to 5k and work on the other portions so I can pass as much of the physical expectations as possible. No more excuses, no more laziness.. there's really no more time to procrastinate and be able to be successful.

After an extremely tough medical call a few weeks ago which had my confidence shattered and my emotions in turmoil, I am beginning to bounce back and feel a small sense of accomplishment and enjoyment my life was once filled with when my pager would go off. My partner and the crew that shows up to lend an extra hand is a big part of it, but the ability to know what needs to be done and be confident in my decisions that they are the best fit for the situation at that moment in time is huge. I am currently taking on the challenge of a fire officer I certification class and that is helping me to have the courage to acknowledge and use some of the qualities others see in me that I don't see in myself in times when I need to take the leadership position and work myself and others through a task. I have to keep reminding myself if others can see good and worth in me, I should too.

I've been filling some spare time working on the family tree. I have a lot of stories on my dad's side of the people on the various branches. On my mom's side I have lots of names and dates but not many stories so that is my goal over the next year is to find out more stories that I can share. Because Maine winters were cold and snowy, I spent a lot of that time working on the family tree. I guess that's why now that the cold has hit here, I find myself wanting to delve into the search engines and pop in the names and dates to find out what I can discover.

My shoulder still bothers me, mostly a chronic ache at this point and I can tell when I have over done things by the different pain the day after I overdo it. It's always sore after a shift at the fire station despite me limiting the amount of lifting and carrying of stuff I do while on shift. The guys I work with are great and most of the time on a medical call I have very little lifting to do and on the fire calls, I am not putting on a scba or going inside of scenes unless I absolutely have to because the shoulder gets sore, just from having the weight of the turnout coat on it and knowing this I don't want to feel what it will feel like with the pack on my back quite yet. I have to get it stronger and less painful so I can get back to life as I knew it on fire calls in addition to the pushups and flex hang that awaits me in February's Ban Bu camp.