Focusing on the "can do's" and not the "can't's"

It's been an interesting couple of weeks in my world. An hour and a half into sword camp 2 weeks ago I was working on judo rolls and managed to partially separate my shoulder...the left one of course. I have a new appreciation for patients who state their pain is a 9 or a 10 with movement. It may help to improve my bedside manner a bit, although I have also learned that sucking it up for a couple seconds to move a hurting body part isn't pleasant, but by the same token isn't going to make me die either so that may cause less sympathy for my patients as well. Suck it up Buttercup!!!

I sulked a bit on day 2. Couldn't sleep on my stomach, had to get help getting out of bed, had to totally figure out a new way to do everything right handed for work and couldn't go to karate because it just hurt too much. I knew I needed to get out of the negativity and head back to my normally optimistic state so I started making my day 3 as normal as my shoulder would permit it. In between the ice packs, ibuprofen and adjusting I went back to karate classes, including finishing out the sword camp. My sling became my bokken sheath and I worked everything I could one handed. Self defense techniques were out of the question, and still are for the most part. Katas are hard, but I either focus on stances or do things the best I can with my shoulder in the sling. As I found out the other day, there are particular positions that if performed in a kata will make my shoulder revert back to feeling like day 1 pain.

I haven't done much fire/ems since the shoulder except attend training. I am planning on 2 shifts this week, thursday/friday night and will adjust as necessary since lifting and pulling still aren't options yet. Hopefully if we get called out the calvary will come and assist my partner with normal duties that I can't perform.

Monday I should be able to get rid of the sling for the most part, only using it when the shoulder gets fatigued or painful from gravity pulling on it. I'm trying to take it slow and back off doing stuff when I know I have pushed it too far. Having learned from the Montana ankle injury that took 2 years to heal and still swells 7 years later when it's been abused.. I don't want a repeat experience...especially since this could affect both work and karate.. currently 2 of the most important things in my world.

Sometimes it's way to easy to focus on what we have lost instead of what we have left. That is a bad, downward spiral that leads to some pretty low points in life. It's an incredibly hard place to pull oneself out of, especially if you don't realize you have fallen into that pit or if you do realize but choose to exist in the darkness instead of seeking the light and finding something to be happy about again because the darkness is the easier of the 2 existences.